


feeling a little mixed

by Scourgefan12



Category: Hellsing
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:08:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27257692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scourgefan12/pseuds/Scourgefan12
Summary: Doc finds something very strange while going through the Valentine brothers' routine checkup.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 8





	feeling a little mixed

The Valentine brothers hadn't been in Millennium for very long. Long enough to have the whole vampirification process done, and to start getting settled in, but overall not long at all. 

They were very much still adjusting to the whole arrangement. Likewise, the organization was still adjusting to them.

The other high ranking officers were getting used to having more people in their ranks, and the ones in charge were getting used to having two more people to look after.

Overall, things were going pretty smoothly. Luke thought so, at least.

To be fair, he'd kind of expected the worst. He'd expected this whole thing to be a scam and for Millennium to just kill them, or imprison them and use them as slaves, or something along those lines. So really, with the bar that low, just about anything could be considered good.

Disregarding those bleak expectations, things were going pretty well. 

For the first time in... well, ever really, Luke had a consistent, well paying job. Before Millennium, every job he'd acquired either hardly paid enough for him to keep himself alive, or was ridiculously hard to keep. Sometimes both.

Meanwhile, Millennium paid enough for himself and probably multiple other households full of people. He wasn't even sure what to do with all this money.

It probably wasn't even that much, really. But it was the most he'd ever gotten, so he couldn't help but make a big deal out of it.

On top of that, Millennium was about as consistent as you could get. As far as Luke knew, the only way out was death. Which, sure, kind of was a red flag, but he couldn't bring himself to care too much. He didn't want out anyway, so why should details like that concern him?

Millennium also gave them a place to stay, and they didn't even have to pay for it or anything. As long as they followed orders and did their job, they could live in the hideout _and_ they were provided with just about anything they might need. It really was an amazing deal.

Not only that, he and his brother were basically immortal now. They'd both been rather surprised when the offer to turn them into vampires had been legitimate, and not some sort of lie or joke.

The process had been a bit painful, any surgery was expected to be, but it had been far better than they'd expected. Their recovery had been remarkably quick, they'd been able to do things like get up and walk around the same day as the procedure had finished, which was far quicker than one would expect for any sort of major surgery.

Luke assumed as much, at least. He didn't have any real experience with these sorts of things.

Their speedy recovery might have had something to do with their regeneration abilities. The one who had turned them, the seemingly mad doctor, had said that was one of the powers they'd wind up with, if everything went according to plan.

And everything _had_ gone according to plan, they'd been turned with little trouble.

That's how things seemed, anyway. They were due for a little checkup, to make sure that assumption was correct.

Jan didn't seem overly concerned with this, insisting that if something had went wrong that they'd be the first to notice. It was their bodies that had been messed with, after all. He was actually kind of annoyed that they had to deal with getting looked at again at all, certain that it would just be a huge waste of time.

Luke had to agree, this seemed like more of a formality than anything. Unlike his brother though, he didn't really mind. It was always good to double check things as important as this, better safe than sorry.

So, when they made their way to the infirmary, at least one of them wasn't complaining.

Once the checkup actually started, Luke found himself feeling a bit more sympathetic towards Jan's grievances. The whole thing was pretty tedious. As well as kind of uncomfortable at points, but he supposed if Doc really was being thorough then that was to be expected.

Luke just went with it, figuring that if he cooperated then it would be done with sooner.

Jan did basically the opposite of that, bitching and moaning the whole time. He'd ask why certain things needed to be done, and then shut Doc down before any real explanation could be given. He continuously squirmed and pushed Doc away, saying that Doc should just keep his fucking hands to himself. He never went so far as to outright try to leave, but he never seemed far from doing so.

Luke quickly felt his sympathy begin to dissipate. He understood that this experience wasn't pleasant, but really, this was ridiculous. He attempted to soothe Jan's nerves, telling him to just let it happen so that they could leave sooner. 

Jan _really_ didn't appreciate this. He seemed offended that Luke would even suggest that he "just lie back and take it" as well as a very colorful assortment of other vulgar comments, all making the same sort of insinuation.

Doc seemed about two seconds away from screaming, nearly at his limit with this behavior. Somehow though, he contained himself, holding back the menagerie of insults he no doubt wanted to throw Jan's way, instead only fixing him with a stern glare.

It was a rather embarrassing experience. Needless to say, Luke didn't make any more attempts at comforting Jan.

Over time, things started going a bit more smoothly. Jan realized he wasn't going to get the reactions he wanted, and after that toned himself down considerably. His struggling nearly stopped completely, regulated to only the occasional weak attempt to push Doc's hands away. And his commentary was restricted to just little insults made under his breath. He basically spent the whole rest of the checkup pouting.

The whole process was much more painful and difficult than it needed to be, thanks to a certain someone not wanting to behave, but eventually it did come to an end. They were able to leave.

Almost. They needed to actually be given the results.

"Well, I have good news." Doc started. "You'll be pleased to know that I found no problems whatsoever."

Well, that was a relief. As far as Luke was concerned, at least.

Jan didn't seem to share that sentiment, muttering a small 'no shit' and insisting that he could've figured that out on his own.

He was, of course, ignored.

"Your bodies are adapting exceptionally well to everything, you two are actually one of my first projects that haven't experienced any sort of complications." Doc informed them. "Luke, you in particular should be ready for your extra enhancements any day now."

"That _is_ good news." Luke couldn't help getting a bit excited hearing that. "I look forward to seeing what you have in store for me."

"You won't be disappointed, I can assure you."

"Yeah, very cool." Jan butted in, stopping that conversation from progressing any farther. "Is that it? Can we go now?"

Doc rolled his eyes at the interruption, but didn't seem overly upset at it.

Luke couldn't complain about it too much either. He supposed he and Doc could discuss that on their own time.

"That's nearly all, just one more thing."

Jan groaned in frustration. "What more could you possibly want? You _just_ said you didn't find anything wrong with us."

"Yes, and I stand by that." Doc replied calmly. "This isn't something wrong, rather something I felt like bringing up with you two because I found it... curious."

Now that caught Luke's attention. "Well, we're listening."

"It's something I noticed when looking over your blood tests." 

They didn't get their blood drawn during this checkup, so Luke assumed that had been done when they'd initially been put under for surgery.

Still, he had to wonder what could be significant enough to bring up, but also wasn't serious enough to be considered a problem.

"It's just..." Doc trailed off, searching for the right words for what he wanted to say. "You two. You're... actually related? Seriously?" And then offhandedly he added "I always just assumed Jan was adopted or something."

Oh. So _that's_ what this was about. Luke sighed, feeling a headache begin to form. He hated this line of questioning. People had been making such a big deal over this their whole lives, and quite honestly it was exhausting. Why did it matter so much?

"Yes, that's correct." He pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to fight the annoyance that naturally rose when people brought up this topic. He reminded himself that it was a perfectly acceptable thing to be curious about. He and Jan looked nothing alike, of course people would make assumptions and ask questions. There was nothing wrong with that.

God, it was fucking aggravating though.

"And before you ask, yes we have the same parents." Might as well get that out of the way. "Though, I'm sure you could figure that out yourself. You're the one with the blood tests, after all."

"Of course." Doc looked like he wanted to ask more, but he could see that this was a bit of a touchy subject. "Thank you for your time. That should be all."

Oh, thank god. Luke was more than ready to get out of here.

"No, hold up, we ain't done here yet." 

_Seriously?_ Jan hadn't even wanted to be here in the first place, why was he dragging this out?

"Is there a problem?" Doc seemed to want to know this as well.

"Um, hell yes there's a problem." Jan said as if it were obvious. He gave Doc a very serious look. "Why the fuck did you assume _I_ was the adopted one? Like why me specifically?"

At that question, Doc looked away, keeping his mouth shut. He didn't seem to have an answer to that. Not a good one, at least.

**Author's Note:**

> Literally only wrote this cause I wanted to get my... relation headcanons? Or whatever the right term would be, out there (Also so that I could use this title, cause I think I'm real funny)  
> Like? Canonically we know that Luke & Jan are brothers, but that's about it. We don't know any details, so  
> I decided to go the Pucci & Weather Report route. Luke & Jan look like they should belong to entirely different families, but despite that, they're out here


End file.
